How many times have you been told that you should clear your life of the people who drain you or bring you down? Unfortunately, this is easier said than done. Often, the relationships will be ones that you can’t get out of because you’ve married into them or you’re related. However, when there are people that you don’t want in your life and you CAN get rid of them please do it! That is to say – don’t follow my example!
I’ve recently had to walk away from a relationship that goes back many years. This person is totally different from me, which is fine of course. However, it wasn’t so much different wavelengths as different planetary frequencies!
Of course, we could ‘chitchat’ but on a deeper level this person had absolutely no idea what I was talking about. I found it very hard to understand what they were saying as well. This was for various reasons, one of which being that they lived in a completely different world from me with lots of specialist vocabulary and abbreviations that they never bothered to explain. (that probably didn’t help to be fair!). Our views of life and personality types were also completely different. This should actually be ok. We can’t live surrounded by clones of ourselves!
However, the real trouble was, I felt I couldn’t be myself. Instead, I morphed into a version of myself, in order for them to be able to ‘understand’ me. I tried not to state certain opinions or talk about certain topics, but it was very uncomfortable. The times I did try to be more true to myself I knew they couldn’t understand me. As an energy practitioner, I’m used to feeling these things and it was like a signal bouncing back off a wall. Basically, like talking to yourself!
Personally, I find it excruciatingly uncomfortable to have to pretend to be somebody I’m not. I knew from the very start that it was wrong and that we were polar opposites. I should have backed off then, but I kept it up out of duty, thinking that it was better not to hurt their feelings.
I’ve realised now that was actually the UNKIND thing to do. It’s so much worse now than if I’d cut ties years ago.
So — here is a very good example of how trying to be a ‘good person’ and do the ‘right thing’ actually causes more harm than good!
THIS is why it’s important to be true to yourself and stop paying so much attention to what you think you ‘should’ do, or what other people might think was right or wrong. I obviously can’t talk! — but my advice would be to try and listen to what your inner voice tells you is right for you, even if you have to hurt someone’s feelings in the short run. It’s so much better for both parties longer term.
So – lesson learned! I resolve to do better in future. For everyone else out there, please listen to what your inner voice tells you is right for you — and particularly — DON’T DO WHAT I DID!